[ Her plea isn't answered in the way she was hoping, and it drives the point deeper that she had lost someone truly special with Abel. Like Amshel, he had become a person that she could count on to always be there to support her when she faltered, because she knew it happened a lot. Yet unlike Amshel, whose loyalty had come at the price of her freedom and any shred of humanity she could have hoped to have, Abel's loyalty was truly priceless. No matter her crimes or her mistakes, he was there to catch her.
It makes her feel amazingly small and vulnerable to not have that. Her hand trembles so slightly that Garry would miss it if he weren't holding her hand, because she's afraid. Diva was a person that had learned to not fear what most people did, from pain to death itself, but when it came to the idea of standing on her own, she was just as afraid as a normal person would be in the face of death. For how she desired freedom so badly, she balked in the face of independence.
Which, though she's ignorant to it, is exactly what Amshel had wanted.
As long as someone could promise to stay by her side, she would let them claim ownership over her. No matter what the cost of that promise might be, as long as she wasn't alone in the world, it didn't matter much to Diva. But it's clear to her from that answer that Garry isn't the person she can rely on. Not in that way. Though her eyes had stayed averted from his while he spoke and for a few moments after, she returns to look at him. And she looks... tired. Tired is really the only word for it, with how her eyes are puffy from crying and how she lets a deep sorrow show openly on her face. Because...
Because she can't promise that either. Can she? ]
I don't know either. I don't want it to be hard for you, though. I know that.
[ What she does next will probably seem like a strange gesture, because even knowing her story, the context is lost. Diva moves his hand so that she nuzzle her forehead against his palm. It's a very old habit, a curious gesture only shown to those she's most comfortable with, because it's a gesture whose roots come from when she was more animal than human. ]
the shippiest non-ship to never sail: the thread
It makes her feel amazingly small and vulnerable to not have that. Her hand trembles so slightly that Garry would miss it if he weren't holding her hand, because she's afraid. Diva was a person that had learned to not fear what most people did, from pain to death itself, but when it came to the idea of standing on her own, she was just as afraid as a normal person would be in the face of death. For how she desired freedom so badly, she balked in the face of independence.
Which, though she's ignorant to it, is exactly what Amshel had wanted.
As long as someone could promise to stay by her side, she would let them claim ownership over her. No matter what the cost of that promise might be, as long as she wasn't alone in the world, it didn't matter much to Diva. But it's clear to her from that answer that Garry isn't the person she can rely on. Not in that way. Though her eyes had stayed averted from his while he spoke and for a few moments after, she returns to look at him. And she looks... tired. Tired is really the only word for it, with how her eyes are puffy from crying and how she lets a deep sorrow show openly on her face. Because...
Because she can't promise that either. Can she? ]
I don't know either. I don't want it to be hard for you, though. I know that.
[ What she does next will probably seem like a strange gesture, because even knowing her story, the context is lost. Diva moves his hand so that she nuzzle her forehead against his palm. It's a very old habit, a curious gesture only shown to those she's most comfortable with, because it's a gesture whose roots come from when she was more animal than human. ]
I don't want to be alone. That's all.